I week of chaos and craziness!!

Well let's just start with the truth!! Last week sucked big time in regards to me taking any real control over my eating and exercise. I can and did put most of the blame on that I was very busy last week....but, in reality, I think I may have used this as a bit of a cop out of really taking a little time to take responsibility for my eating and exercise.

Funny enough, i just looked up the word for busyness....take a look at this:
lively but meaningless activity.
something cluttered with detail to the point of being distracting.

My personality is somewhat detailed!! and perfectionistic. And one tell tale sign is when I get busy or have a lot going on, suddenly my life becomes clutttered with detail, and meaningless activity which often distracts me from my real goals and focus in life. I seem to get caught up in this wirlwind of lively but meaningless actvity. All my energy and emotion is focused on these details and I get distracted from the things that really matter to me.

Last week, I had a number of projects to complete in a reasonably short time-frame. Ideally, I should have listed the things that were a "must do" and prioritise them by most important and urgent. Then I should have given myself a time limit to get the tasks done, remembering that perfection may not be possible in the time-frames given. Also, I should remember that there are more important things in life such as getting enough sleep, rest, eating well and exercise that will help me function well and complete my deadlines better.

Actually, I did attempt to do these things and I even encouraged myself to try and not be so perfect about the tasks and to just get them done. Ah, alas but my personality in detail and perfectionism have been ingrained into my thinking and actions for so long, they didn't really take my advice seriously and low and behold, I found myself getting quite cluttered with detail and frazzled from overwork (that I gave myself - not from anyone else!!!).

As a result, my energy and focus was so engrossed in my meaningless detail that it did become a distraction to everything else in my life. I felt I had no energy or time for bothering with preparing healthy meals or doing exercise (apart from Salsa dancing) and I was constantly looking toward coffee, caffinated products and sugary foods to get an extra boost. Even though I knew these weren't healthy choices, I rationalised my decision by saying that I just needed some more energy to finish the task or get the next task done or that it was only temporary and I'd get back on track next week. Lucky for me, I really do want to get back on track and I do want to find a better way, thus the reason I'm writing my story down now!!

Actually, I've found this experience to be a good lesson to learn. I definitely have discovered over the past couple of weeks that a couple of environmental things have had a strong and negative effect on my sense of control or ability to control my eating and exercise. It is good to see what environmental/mental/emotional factors seem to trigger me to relapsing into unhealthy eating and lack of exercise. I've noticed the 4 following things that have been problem areas for me:
1. Boredom (as seen in the last blog....I can't seem to stop munching).
2. Busyness (my experience last week, I get so caught up in details that I neglect the basic things in life which keep me fit and healthy).
3. Tiredness / Lethargy (tiredness is the result of busyness and lethargy is the result of boredom)
4. Sickness (results of busyness, tiredness, unhealthy eating and lack of exercise. All these factors combined usually result in my body crying out for me to stop treating it so badly)

I'm so thankful to myself for starting this blog because writing this stuff down is really helping me to understand what is happening in my life. I can see the way I'm reacting to different events, and the way I'm thinking and the actions I'm choosing. I am able to see more clearly the results my thoughts and decisions are having and how their affecting my life (for the better or worse).

Anyway, that's enough for today. Last week was a tough one, a wake-up call and a lesson to be learned. I'm back on track and ready for the next challenge.

cheers
Kirsty